Chapters: Numbers or Names?

It’s recommended by writing gurus, that a cliffhanger teaser at the end of a novel, can generate interest in the next book, which set me to thinking about how a fictional story is organised.

I finished my fifth novel at the end of 2018. I’ve applied the same format to all of my books, a template that makes it easy for me to navigate around where I’ve been and where I’m going.

Aiming for the recommended 80,000 words of my crime genre, I produce an average of 38 chapters that vary in length from 1,800 to 4,000 words. The longer chapters have two or three section breaks—I love section breaks—a great way of suggesting connections in a plot.

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I number and name my chapter headings, (Chapter 37—Under the Skin), which may be a bit belt & braces of me, but there’s a method in my eccentricity. The main reason is, to help the reader remember where they are, and also a named chapter acts as a hook to pull them in.

From my experience as a librarian, I know that readers use odd reasons to reject a book…too many pages, too many chapters and chapters that are too long. I’m kind of playing the odds here, for polls of readers show that it’s mainly women who read anyway, and most readers of crime fiction are female, and there are more older readers than young. Hopefully, my anticipated demographic of readers will appreciate me keeping things neat!

I’ve observed from the novels I’ve been reading, that most use numbered chapters, with only a few having titles. Some dispense with chapters completely, and the text is laid out in paragraphs and section breaks. A few separate the story into parts, to describe things from a different point of view or when there’s a chronological gap.

There’s been a trend recently, to have chapters alternate their POV. Gone Girl and Girl On A Train did this with each chapter bearing the name of which character was speaking.

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I don’t think that it’s always the author who chooses how to lay out their chapters, as there may be editorial decisions made by the publisher to have the layout conform to a house style.

How do you organise your story?

‘His novel was refused, and his movie was panned’

A bit of humour for those us wondering why the hell we do what we do, by writing stories that never see the light of day.

Things can come right, even if it means waiting…hopefully not until the afterlife, as in Johnny Cash’s version of Loudon Wainwright III’The Man Who Couldn’t Cry.

Lyrics here for those of you who want to sing along.

Johnny Cash – The Man Who Couldn’t Cry Lyrics | MetroLyrics

Never Give Up! Rejected 200 times, then wins book award

A heartening story about an author who persevered for ten years, through 200 rejections, before getting published. 

Brian Conaghan found himself in the running for the overall Costa Book Award, having won the children’s prize.

Coatbridge writer Brian Conaghan wins Costa book award – BBC News

Hope for us all!

I’m too bloody-minded to quit—some call this determination—others stubbornness.

I just hope that I don’t end up like one of those fighters who won’t admit defeat, staying in the ring until they turn the lights out!

Planet Spell Checker

I’m interested in learning if anyone knows where companies who produce writing software get their spell checkers from.

I’d have thought that to support their product, the spell checker would be of the highest quality, perhaps produced by, and bought from, an expert in dictionaries, such as Oxford, Collins or Chambers. This is hard to credit when I see the words my software queries. It’s easier to believe that spell checkers are based on an outdated children’s dictionary acquired for a few pennies at a charity shop!

I use LibreOffice Writer to create my novels, as it’s easier for me to understand than MS Word and more importantly, is free! It has a thesaurus and an automatic spell checker, which I’m sometimes grateful of, other times irritated by.

Grammarly provides useful support, and I’m particularly glad of its punctuation checker as I tend to suffer from comma-itis! Its spell checker is just as elementary as LibreOffice. Words that I’ve typed recently, and which have been questioned, include track, moor, wizard, mauve and siphon.

I’ve added them to the spell checker’s dictionary so that it doesn’t query their use again. I well understand, why British novelist Will Self declared that the one thing he’d rescue from his burning house would be his laptop—not for the WIP—rather, to preserve his spell checker!

Occasionally, the software cautions me in a humorous way. Just this morning, I was writing about a dangerous guard dog, which my detective protagonist sees prowling the house of criminals he has under surveillance. When it barks, it reminds him of the Hound of The Baskervilles. Spell checker sprang into action, asking me ‘Do you mean Hound of The Basketballs?

Getting Mad, Baby! What angers you about writing?

Since returning to creative writing six years ago, I’ve scrambled up several steep learning curves to do with the business of writing. These include formatting, book cover design, marketing the ebooks I self-published on Smashwords and Amazon and the all-important lessons of how to write a synopsis and query agents.

I made another round of supplications to the ‘gatekeepers’, in February, after spending the previous two months editing my fifth novel. As any writer knows, that feels like wading through porridge, but there’s still a discernible feeling of achievement in having polished a manuscript.

I’m at a stage where I feel like I’ve created a potentially commercial product—which is how I’m increasingly coming to view my novels—rather than taking joy in them as a readable story. Despite this confidence, I know I’m a nobody, an unpublished author looking for his first publishing contract. Any marketability I have comes from where I live in Cornwall, which is popular as a holiday destination and from being the location of the successful television adaptation of Winston Graham’s Poldark stories.

I know that some bestselling authors are poor writers, but what makes me mad is that if my manuscript was submitted to the gatekeepers by a media celebrity (who’s already got fame and wealth), then it would be snaffled up immediately. Commercially, it’s the way of the world in publishing that someone with an existing high profile, a ‘platform’, will be more attractive a risk than someone anonymous who will take more effort to promote—but it still makes me mad!

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It’s proof that no one cares what you’ve written. Would-be readers are more enticed by already knowing who the author is, than anything to do with the quality of the story. As an example supermodel/supertwit Naomi Campbell has ‘written’ several novels and biographies—I don’t know if she’s read them! 

That’s what makes me angry—realising publishing is a business and has little to do with art.

How about you?

Reading in Bed

For as long as I can remember, I’ve read in bed before going to sleep.

I read in other places, of course, including on the ‘throne’! I’ve known several people who had bookshelves in their bathrooms, so they plainly expected you to be gone for some time and to come out from your ablutions more intelligent than when you entered.

Reading at work was easy when I was a librarian and a teacher, as it’s expected, but I once had a dreadful job on a production line in a factory that made artificial cream. I was second in the process, standing on a raised platform 12′ high, manning a stainless steel bath which tilted in a cradle operated by a large lever. Huge pipes supplied me with liquid ingredients, pumped from silos large enough to contain a bus. I filled the bath with the correct proportions of ingredients—lecithin, milk powder, gelatine, sweetener and vegetable oil, stirring it with a giant wooden spoon to prevent clogging, before tipping the mixture into another pipe which descended to filters and blending mechanisms. These pipes decreased in size until they entered the packing room, where the jollop was poured into pots to be sealed with foil lids. I was up there with nothing do for twenty minutes, in between batches, so took to reading a paperback—until the floor manager saw me. I was banned from reading…worker ants aren’t meant to use their brains.

Incidentally, the single and double ‘cream’ we made had an extra ingredient for a couple of weeks, as a lazy operative failed to clean one of the filters, which was awkward to dismantle. He went on holiday, and his replacement discovered a dead and rather rotten rat in the filter! They didn’t issue a recall for the thousands of pots of cream affected.

Laying in bed with books for companions is relaxing. I’ve lived alone for a while, but have read to wives and lovers, and occasionally been read to. There’s something that’s charmingly soothing about being told a story, like regressing to childhood.

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I’m not sure that I could easily get to sleep, without reading first. I like to ring the changes, so have four books on the go at the moment—a novel, a poetry collection, a lovely art book by David Trigg called Reading Art: Art For Book Lovers and a popular psychology book. About 90 minutes of reading sees me nodding off, and after turning the darkness on, I send a wish to my self-conscious about my WIP before descending into sleep.

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Reading in bed is a great pleasure and one that I enjoy without disturbing anyone, being a solitary soul. In the past, I’ve read to various wives and lovers at bedtime—and even been read to a few times—happy times.

Nonetheless, an inconsiderate partner who reads for hours, bedside table light blazing, can be a pain. Legendary Hollywood actress Jean Harlow supposedly divorced her third husband because he read in bed, as mentioned in this article:

Reading in bed is valid grounds for divorce

A discreet clip-on book light helps to keep the peace.

Do you read in bed?

To yourself, a partner or a child?

Do you have a clip-on book light?

Or, do you read from an ebook reader?

Or, an audiobook?

Do you ever dream about what you read?

What are you reading at the moment?

Reading In Bed by Mernet Larsen

Meeting your Favourite Author

I came across this quote recently, from J.D. Salinger’s The Catcher in the Rye:

“What really knocks me out is a book that, when you’re all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn’t happen much, though.” 
― 
J.D. SalingerThe Catcher in the Rye

It made me think of a contradictory epigram, from Arthur Koestler:

To want to meet an author because you like his books is as ridiculous as wanting to meet the goose because you like pate de foie gras.”—Arthur Koestler

All the same, it made me wonder which of my favourite authors I’d like to have a friendly chat with—for the purposes of this flight of fancy, I’ve allowed time-travel to include deceased writers. In no particular order, my wish list includes:

Guy de Maupassant, Richard Brautigan, Michael Connelly, John Connolly, Dennis Lehane, Barbara Kingsolver, Alice Hoffmann, J B Priestley, James Lee Burke and John Steinbeck.

Who would you like to talk to?

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Jumping through Hoops

I’ve written and edited five novels since 2014. If writing a story is like wandering a world I’ve created, with beautiful scenery and fascinating characters, then editing resembles staggering through an endless swamp in thick fog, wearing lead boots; the only sign of life is the croaking of frogs—and they’re not saying nice things! 

Apart from chasing down repetitions, clumsy sentences and punctuation errors, I use lists like Diana Urban’s 43 Words You Should Cut From Your Writing Immediatelyas well as a list I’ve made of words and expressions I tend to use too much.

I firmly believe that this odious task improves the readability of my manuscript, yet, despite this, I wonder who I’m doing the editing for….Tidying my writing may impress a literary agent or publisher’s editor, though they’ll still find things to correct. As for any reader who may be drawn to my stories, I’m not sure that they’d notice the improvements. 

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The reason that I say this, is that the most frightfully written rubbish becomes a best-selling book. Also, while editing, I’ve read crime novels by three of my favourite authors, and they most definitely didn’t do any of the nit-picking I’m bogged down with at the moment. I admire Harlan Coben and Jeffery Deaver for the readability of their stories, but neither uses language beyond the vocabulary of a ten-year-old. John Connolly is more literary in style, but my jaw dropped when I read a short paragraph of five sentences, which contained the word ‘had’ nine times!

‘Had’ is one of the words I hunt down, so it made me question who edits his manuscripts, and how he gets away with such gawkiness. The answer is, of course, that he’s a successful author with a long track record. You only have to look at the monumental length of J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter novels, which started off at the conventional word count of 80,000, but escalated to 257,000 once she’d achieved mega-sales. You don’t tell the goose that’s laying golden eggs what to do! 

Editing manuscripts feels like an initiation rite, a compulsory test that I have to do, to please gatekeepers whose judgement has little to do with what a reader likes. I’m a grumpy lion, who’s never been good at jumping through hoops, but do any of you feel the same way?

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Success, then Failure

I had doubts about posting the link to an article by Merritt Tierce, for it makes rather depressing reading. Most of us are still chasing our first book deal or struggling with how to market our self-published books, so to hear that a critically acclaimed novel made only modest sales is disheartening.

I Published My Debut Novel to Critical Acclaim—and Then I Promptly Went Broke

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It certainly put the author in a quandary, for she realised that all the praise in the world doesn’t help to pay the bills. She’s experiencing a form of writer’s block, where she wants to write but has to earn a living by working for others.

As she says: 

“I AM A WRITER WHO’S ASHAMED TO NOT KNOW HOW TO MAKE MONEY AS A WRITER.”

The very few authors who have earned great wealth from writing is a reflection of the disparity in income, wealth and influence of society—1% control a disproportionate amount.

Writing has always been a tough way to earn a living, and there are plenty of well-known authors who struggle to make ends meet:

From bestseller to bust: is this the end of an author’s life?

Kind of makes me glad, that I’m used to being poor! 

How about you?