How To Deal With The Press

She’ll urge you to confide. Resist.
Be careful, courteous, and cool.
Never trust a journalist.

‘We’re off the record,’ she’ll insist.
If you believe her, you’re a fool.
She’ll urge you to confide. Resist.

Should you tell her who you’ve kissed,
You’ll see it all in print, and you’ll
Never trust a journalist

Again. The words are hers to twist,
And yours the risk of ridicule.
She’ll urge you to confide. Resist.

‘But X is nice,’ the publicist
Will tell you. ‘We were friends at school.’
Never trust a journalist

Hostile, friendly, sober, pissed,
Male or female – that’s the rule.
When tempted to confide, resist.
Never trust a journalist.

Wendy Cope

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wendy_Cope